Ventura, California
-In a move to continue to offer economic stimulus to the United States, President Biden today announced he is getting closer to a decision on reducing the nation’s overwhelming student loan debt. This is especially good news for those that took Sir Phil’s Flogger 101 classes at the Ventura Community Center in the beachside city in California.
“I’m a newbie to the lifestyle,” said William “Menace Master” Johnson, a local resident in nearly Carpenteria, CA, “but I knew more about using a flogger than anything Sir Phil told us in nearly 11 hours of instruction over a three day weekend. I can’t believe I wasted $500 for that course. And after, all I got was a PDF diploma.”
The elimination of some student loan debt could proffer real economic stimulus for those who sat through Flogger 101 last February, offering many a sense of closure for the time wasted sitting on folding metal chairs while Sir Phil droned on and on while showing off his collection of color coordinated floggers.
A theoretical refund of the $500 tuition would not include compensation for purchases of the easily broken plastic detachable floggers Sir Phil sold at a card table on breaks.
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